Varric’s What They’re Thinking:
Hawke: So much unspoken. Perhaps I should make a joke about how that face of Andraste makes his ‘Legacy of Starkhaven’ look big?
Sebastian: I sense…impurity, coming from somewhere…
Sebastian: Ah, it’s only Hawke. A curious and unpredictable man, that Hawke. But a good one nonetheless, if at times misguided.
Hawke: What a frustratingly sexual nose he has.
Hawke: What to say, what to say… ‘Good afternoon, Sebastian; I see you’re in the Maker’s house demonstrating the applicable uses of temptation, as always?’ No, no, Hawke; that lacks your usual finesse. Oh, if only Varric were here; he’d know what to say, and how to say it so well…
Sebastian: Hawke’s been staring at me for an awfully long time. Perhaps he has something to confess?
Isabela’s What They’re Thinking:
Hawke: Maker, my trousers are tight around my throbbing manhood.
Sebastian: The aching shadow of sexual temptation approaches. I hear his footsteps and they echo with fire in my belly…
Sebastian: I turn—
Hawke: I yearn!
Chantry Candles: We burn.
Chantry Vases: We urn.
Sebastian: ‘Ah, Hawke. You came at just the right time. Perhaps you might join me in that confessional to speak in hushed voices of sin…?’
Hawke: Oh, Sebastian, I thought you’d never ask!
Merrill’s What They’re Thinking:
Hawke: This is the face Fenris makes sometimes!
Sebastian: My eyes are as blue as the sky!
Hawke: Why, the hair at the back of his head is shaped like the backside of a duck!
Sebastian: Follow your nose, wherever it goes!
Hawke: This is the other face Fenris makes!
Elthina: At times I feel as though I’m all alone with this enormous pumpkin…
Hawke: And this is my sexy face! Oh, I knew I shouldn’t have had all that bacon for breakfast!
Sebastian: Have you seen my sky-blue eyes? Suddenly I’m hungry for thick-cut cured meats!
Anders’s What They’re Thinking:
Hawke: I should be getting back to Anders.
Sebastian: And I’m a pompous fool who enjoys accessorizing with the faces of long-dead martyrs, but all the shiny white armor in the world can’t make my heart any purer.
Varric: Blondie, that’s not how the game is—
Anders: I don’t care. We have no time for subtlety of prose anymore, Varric.
Varric: Well, I guess that does explain the manifesto.
Fenris’s What They’re Thinking:
Hawke: Something inappropriate.
Sebastian: Something about the Maker.
Hawke: Something even more inappropriate.
Sebastian: Hoping Hawke will not be inappropriate out loud where anyone can hear him.
Hawke: Preparing the inappropriate blackpowder, as it were.
Hawke: ‘Fart joke.’
Sebastian: Maker, no.
Aveline’s What They’re Thinking:
Not bloody enough, that’s what they’re thinking.
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